The Writing Game: Work at Something You Love
Stream of conscious 10/12/23
Photo by John Jennings on Unsplash
I want to be profound when all I need to do is be real.
I want to write. When I started this, it was for myself. But it’s gotten bigger than me. Now, I have you here with me.
And I want to say you deserve everything. But that’s not right. Maybe you deserve love and respect as a human being with feelings.
But you don’t deserve everything, and neither do I.
You don’t just get to be successful. You don’t get to be at the top of your field. You don’t get a participation medal. You have to earn these things.
People have forgotten the value of hard work. They’ve forgotten what it means to work for something.
The satisfaction is in playing the game, not beating it.
I don’t want to win a reward that I didn’t do anything to deserve.
You like hard work. You like your hard work to be noticed.
That’s how games work.
You take enjoyment in learning and figuring it out.
I picked the guitar back up yesterday. I forgot how much I love playing. Even though I’m terrible, I get something out of plucking the strings.
I love strumming chords and putting them together.
Life is about working on things you enjoy.
I used to watch Netflix all day long. I was deep in depression and spent my time binge-eating and binge-watching my latest craving.
At the end of the day, I felt terrible. I hated it. I didn’t like who I was or what I was doing.
When I started writing, I fell in love. Not just because I enjoy writing but because I could see progress on the screen.
Tomorrow is my two-year writing anniversary, and I should be celebrating.
Instead, I’ve been moaning about what a tough time I’ve had writing this last week.
I have to fall back in love with the process, even if that means doing it for myself.
I’m so grateful for all of the support you’ve given me. I’m not going to stop writing ever.
Creating words brings me joy, and it’s important to remember why you’re doing something. I’m writing because it brings me peace in a chaotic world.
You’re going to find something different. You may enjoy welding, painting, running, football, or any other things available.
Not everything has to be an act of service for others. You’re allowed to enjoy things all on your own.
Picking the guitar up reminded me of that. Music is personal to me. It’s a place where I can go and be completely vulnerable. Writing is the same way.
Lucky me, the two go together nicely.
Writing started out as a passion project for me. It’s evolved into something more, and I’m grateful I get to do it. But it’s always good to remember why you started.
Tonight, I’m writing for myself, no strings, no obligations, just me.
And I feel like I’m falling back in love.
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Maggie Kelly is a freelance writer who writes about mental health, self-help, and psychology. Contact at maggiepkelly@gmail.com
