The Power of Your Words: Be Careful What You Say

Your words control your life

yellow sticker that says, "heavy" — Photo by Keagan Henman on Unsplash

My family had just moved to a new town.

I was invited to a sleepover for one of my classmate’s birthdays. We all went around in a circle and shared what we liked and didn’t like about a person.

It was my turn, and I refused to say anything bad about anyone. Then, the ‘It’ girl got to me. I have no clue what positive thing she said about me because it was overshadowed.

“You’re too angry.”

I was hurt. I felt like I had been attacked and I was a wounded animal.

Years later, I still remember it.

Something so small had a lasting impact.

That’s the power of your words.

The Never-Ending Cycle

You’re thoughtless in how you use your words. Surely, it can’t matter that much. Can words really hold that much power? Let’s explore.

I used to think, “I’m so lazy.” I thought this was my default state, and I was a lazy bum.

I believed I was lazy, and I acted like a sloth. I took many naps. I didn’t get work done. My behavior only affirmed my belief that I was lazy. It was one big self-fulfilling prophecy.

My words turned into my thoughts. My thoughts evolved into beliefs. My beliefs impacted my actions. You speak things into existence every day.

When I changed my words from “I’m so lazy” to “I’m full of energy,” my energy level changed.

My refrain of “I have energy” transformed into me having energy.

The Wordsmith’s Power

child picking apples from a tree — Image credit: Lexica

“The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” — Proverbs 18:21, NIV

The words you speak make a difference, whether it’s to yourself or someone else.

Words have the power to build someone up or tear them down. It’s up to you how you use your words. You are a wordsmith.

What words do you use to describe yourself? When you talk to yourself, what do you say?

I used to have terrible self-esteem. I said, “I hate myself” all the time. I was unkind and didn’t like who I was.

Would you talk to your five-year-old self that way? No. It would make you feel bad and cry.

Would you say that to your best friend? Unlikely.

You word vomit, thinking the words you say don’t matter. But in one sentence, you can ruin or save someone’s life.

The Protest

You may think, “Oh, it’s just words.” They’re harmless. What’s it going to do? Would you say that if your child were being bullied?

I’ve had friends be mean or make jokes at my expense. They defend it with, “I didn’t mean it,” or “It was just a joke.” But it didn’t feel like a joke. It felt like an attack.

There’s truth in everything and every joke you say.

People are sensitive. You never know what they’ve gone through. And your words carry a weight that someone has to bear.

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words leave psychological wounds that never heal.” — Fairy Odd Parents

The Bright Side

woman walking in front of a yellow wall — Photo by Rodion Kutsaiev on Unsplash

Remember how it felt when someone complimented your shirt? Something so small can make your day turn around.

And if you can do that for someone else, you can do it for yourself as well. Consider affirmations.

There’s a reason why people use them. Affirmations help condition you to see yourself and the world as a better place.

Try using them and see what happens. It feels foreign at first, but repeating positive phrases can help you feel better.

Final Thoughts

I used to have a friend who would often tease me for something I liked. She did it harmlessly, thinking it was totally okay. But I didn’t feel okay.

I felt like I was being laughed at, and my opinions were stupid. At the time, I let it slide.

Today, I would speak up for myself. Nobody should have to feel bad about themselves for normal human behaviors.

Yet we put up with it all the time. If you spent time using your words for good, the world could be better.

Next time you’re inclined to say something negative, pause.

Think about what you’re saying and be mindful. Be intentional with the words you use.

Your words shape your life.

Ready to level yourself up and become the best version of yourself? Download my free journaling guide now.

Maggie Kelly is a freelance writer who writes about mental health, self-help, and psychology. Contact at maggiepkelly@gmail.com